20 March 2014 Comments Off on COUPLES THERAPY EXPLAINED


So you’ve been thinking about going to couples therapy because you’re tired of the same old arguments that end up in angry outbursts and blame. Yet, you’ve heard that couples therapy can lead to conflict, chaos or even divorce. So you keep putting it off. Well, I’m here to tell you that couples counseling usually doesn’t lead to divorce and it can really help even the happiest of couples feel even better. A good couple’s therapist will create a safe environment, won’t take sides and will help you see the dance that you and your partner are doing that keeps you stuck. Yes, couples come in because of conflict but, ironically, the conflict, when deconstructed, can actually bring a couple closer through empathy and understanding. And, taking the time to understand your spouse will help them feel cared about and may teach you a thing or two about them. We rarely know as much as we think we know about our partners and this information can result in more empathy, interest and connection. Couples therapy will teach you how to be vulnerable without getting clobbered and how to ask for what you want. You will also learn to be more direct and accepting. And, if you have children, they can benefit from you and your spouse enjoying each other more and will now have wonderful role-models for their future relationships. Honestly, you don’t have to be on the verge of divorce to go to couples therapy. It is helpful for those people too but sometimes even those couples just needed some tweaking. If couples therapy could be helpful for you or someone you know, please feel free to e.mail me at: nanlcsw@gmail.com or call me at 847.491.1111. Feel free to pass this on to a friend. It is my pleasure to help anyone have a better relationship.